Saturday, January 10, 2015

A new year to persevere.

Hello, twenty fifteen!

It's hard to believe a new year has started. I'm not sure if I'm ready for it, but here it is.

Brielle turned TWO a few weeks ago on Christmas Eve. My sweet little girl has certainly had an eventful holiday season. Not like we hoped, but still hope-full.

In early December, after meeting with her new doctor, Brielle had an MRI scan that came back clear of any concerns! We are so so thankful that her brain is healthy and no major damage has been done due to seizures or otherwise. Gratefully we can check that one off the list of possibilities. 

Shortly thereafter, she was put on a low dose of anti-seizure medication to see how her body responded. Did I mention her doctor sent me a link for a prescription coupon that saved us $150? Yes, because he is awesome like that :)

After a few days, Brielle was adjusting pretty well to the meds and seemed happy and motivated to "practice" her sitting up and moving around more. It was the glimmer of hope that we needed. I told her she may as well give herself a birthday present and start walking. Ok, I knew that was a lofty goal-- but it was wonderful to see her active.

However, after a few weeks, we increased her meds again, with less-than-stellar adjustments. Brielle was, to put it bluntly, miserable. Fussy, whiney, lethargic, unmotivated... MISERABLE. We hung on for a few weeks, hoping she would start to feel better and adjust to the medication, but she never did. So, the birthday and holiday festivities were a bit rough on her, unfortunately. 

Good news is, though, we dropped her dosage back down and in just a few days have already seen her improve in her mood and motivation. I missed seeing those sweet smiles and cute little noises. I am enjoying having our little girl "back" after a daunting three weeks. Please pray we can determine what is best for her regarding medication.

So what's next? Therapy. Prayer. Waiting. Persevering.

We're holding off on a second EEG, only because she is on medication and it is less likely the EEG will show any seizure activity while on it. To be honest, I'm relieved that we don't have to subject her to that test again right now-- not to mention the travel and costs involved.

We are eager to see what the Lord will do in our daughter's life this year. We are hopeful, and cautiously optimistic. Continuing to trust in His plans for her. We know her "timeline" will look very different than most kiddos. We are learning to accept that and adjust to it. There is still a grieving process that comes with recognizing that our child is different and has special needs. But more importantly, it allows us to be free to just meet her where she is, and love her without expectation. 

Watching our son, Judah, love on his sister so uninhibited... without judgments or worries or comparisons. It's eye-opening. He adores her, gives her big hugs and kisses on the head. He tries to explain things to her to comfort her when he knows she's upset about something. He involves her when playing together, he treats her equally--despite their age and ability differences. I am learning so much from my children. God is teaching me through my children's unconditional love for one another. Lord, may I love like that.